Who is Missing?

Name and Purpose

• Who is Missing? is a gentle memory and observation game that helps players learn each other’s names and notice one another.
• Great as an icebreaker or a calm reset activity.

a.k.a.

• Sneaky Seat, Memory Circle

Age / Group / Time / Space

• Ages 8-16 | 8-30 players | 10-15 minutes | A room or outdoor space with a nearby hiding spot

Materials

• No materials required
• Optional: a blanket or folding screen behind which the hider waits

Quick-Run Card

1. Players sit in a circle and close their eyes (or look down).
2. Staff quietly tap one player. That player sneaks away to hide nearby.
3. Everyone opens their eyes. Look around the circle.
4. Players take turns guessing who is missing.
5. The hidden player comes back. Everyone celebrates. Rotate and repeat.

Setup and Boundaries

• Signal: one clap = open your eyes; two claps = wrap up
• Identify the hiding spot before play (nearby room, behind a screen, or a marked area just outside the circle)
• Make sure the hiding spot is safe, visible to staff, and not isolating

How to Play

1. Players sit comfortably in a circle.
2. Everyone closes their eyes or looks at the floor. Staff walk around the circle slowly.
3. Staff gently tap one player on the shoulder. That player quietly stands and moves to the hiding spot (pre-agreed location).
4. Staff say: “Open your eyes. Someone is missing. Who is it?”
5. Players look around the circle and take turns guessing. First correct guess earns a cheer from the group.
6. The hidden player comes back to the circle to applause.
7. To make it trickier: while eyes are closed, staff gently guide players to shuffle one or two spots around the circle before opening their eyes.
8. Rotate: the player who guessed correctly (or the returning hidden player) chooses who hides next round.
9. No one is ever waiting alone without a role: while the group guesses, the hidden player can do a small silent action (pose, count to themselves) to stay engaged.

I-OPt Options

• Start
  • A (Active): Join the circle and take a full guessing turn each round
  • S (Support): Help manage the hiding area or ensure the hiding player gets there quietly
  • Q (Quiet): Sit in the circle and watch before taking a guess turn
  • O (Observer): Watch the first round from just outside the circle, then join
• Mid
  • A (Active): Volunteer to be the hidden player
  • S (Support): Keep track of who has already had a turn hiding
  • Q (Quiet): Guess quietly by pointing or whispering rather than calling out
  • O (Observer): Step back for a round and return at the next rotation
• Late
  • A (Active): Try the shuffled-seats variation for an extra challenge
  • S (Support): Help players who are having trouble guessing by giving a small hint
  • Q (Quiet): Focus on the listening and noticing part, not the competitive guessing
  • O (Observer): Count how quickly the group identifies the missing person across rounds
• End
  • A (Active): Suggest a speed round with two players hiding at once
  • S (Support): Help settle the group for the debrief
  • Q (Quiet): Share one word about the game
  • O (Observer): Name something new they noticed about a group member today

Inclusion Adaptations

• Players who are not comfortable closing their eyes can look at the floor or cover their face with their hands instead
• Players who do not want to hide (e.g., feel anxious leaving the group) can take the role of “Circle Keeper” and help manage the signal instead

Stewardship Moment

• No materials to clean up
• Reflection: “Did you notice something about a group member today that you had not paid attention to before?”

Consent

• Pre-brief: “This game involves closing your eyes for a short time. For those not comfortable closing their eyes, looking down at the floor is another option. The hiding spot is always close by and visible to staff.”
• Mid-game check: After two rounds, do a quick thumbs up/sideways/down
• Opt-out/re-entry: Any player can choose not to hide. They can take the Circle Keeper role instead and re-enter the guessing circle whenever they are ready

Risks and Mitigation

• Hidden player feeling isolated: ensure the hiding spot is close, safe, and staff can see it at all times
• Players feeling left out if never chosen to hide: staff track who has had a turn and ensure rotation

Warm-Up Suggestions

• “Name Echo”: go around the circle; each player says their name and the group echoes it back
• “One Thing”: each player says one quick fact about themselves before the game starts

Debrief Questions

• What? “How quickly did you notice someone was missing? What helped you figure it out?”
• So What? “What does it tell us that we noticed each other?”
• Now What? “What is one way you could notice and acknowledge someone who is often overlooked?”

Cleanup and Reset

• No materials to collect
• Ensure the hiding spot is back to normal (chair returned, screen folded, etc.)