Honey, If You Love Me

Name and Purpose

Honey, If You Love Me is a gentle, playful circle game that builds confidence, eye contact, and the ability to keep a straight face under friendly pressure.
Players practise self-regulation, humour, and connection in a low-stakes, welcoming way.

a.k.a.

Age / Group / Time / Space

Ages 10-16 | 8-30 players | 10-15 minutes | Any indoor or outdoor space where players can sit or stand in a circle

Materials

Quick-Run Card

Form a circle, seated or standing. One player volunteers to be the first Charmer.
The Charmer approaches any player and says: “Honey, if you love me, will you please, please smile?”
The player responds: “Honey, I love you, but I just can’t smile.” If they smile or laugh, they become the next Charmer.
If they hold a straight face, the Charmer moves on to someone else.
The Charmer may use funny faces, voices, or gentle movement, but no physical contact.

Setup and Boundaries

Form a clear circle. Everyone should be able to see each other.
Signal: 1 raised hand = pause; 2 = stop and gather.
Establish one rule before play: no physical contact. Charm with voice, expression, and presence only.
Check that the circle is big enough for the Charmer to walk freely through the middle.

How to Play

Players sit or stand in a circle with enough space for one person to walk around inside.
One volunteer starts as the Charmer.
The Charmer approaches any player, looks them in the eyes, and says: “Honey, if you love me, will you please, please smile?”
That player responds: “Honey, I love you, but I just can’t smile.” They must keep a straight face while saying it.
If the player smiles or laughs at any point, they swap with the Charmer and the round continues.
If the player holds a straight face, the Charmer chooses someone else.
The Charmer may use silly voices, slow delivery, dramatic pauses, or funny expressions. No touching.
There is no win condition. Play until the energy is high and everyone has had a turn as Charmer.

I-OPt Options

A (Active): Be the Charmer; go all-in with performance and expression.
S (Support): Encourage nervous players to try; hold a quiet smile of appreciation from the circle.
Q (Quiet): Sit in the circle and participate as a straight-face holder; smaller reactions, smaller role.
O (Observer): Watch and laugh freely from just outside the circle; join the circle when ready.

Inclusion Adaptations

Players who are not comfortable being the Charmer: they can participate as straight-face holders in the circle and pass when approached as Charmer by giving a thumbs-up to the next person.
Players with communication differences who may find the scripted phrase hard: a simplified version (“Will you smile?”) counts the same.

Stewardship Moment

No materials or cleanup needed.
Reflection: “What’s the best funny face you saw tonight? What made you laugh most?”

Consent

Pre-brief: “This game involves someone walking up to you and trying to make you smile. For those not comfortable being the Charmer or having someone stand close to them, watching from the circle counts as full participation, and there’s no pressure to take a turn as Charmer.”
Mid-game check: After a few rounds, check in. “For those not comfortable with any element, an observer or helper role is another option. Thumbs?”
Opt-out/re-entry: A player can shake their head when the Charmer approaches, meaning ‘not this turn.’ The Charmer moves on with no comment. Re-enter at any time.

Risks and Mitigation

A player feels singled out or embarrassed: normalise passing and redirect the Charmer quickly if a player looks uncomfortable.
Charmer uses physical contact: remind the group at the start that charm works best with expression and voice only.
One Charmer stays stuck for too long: after 3 unsuccessful attempts, the leader can gently volunteer another player to try the role.

Warm-Up Suggestions

“Funny Face Circle”: each player makes their best funny face around the circle, one at a time.
“Laugh Chain”: one player makes a short laugh sound; the next player copies it with a twist; pass around the circle.

Debrief Questions

What? “Who was the hardest person to crack? What made them so good at holding it in?”
So What? “What did you notice about what made people laugh, versus what kept them composed?”
Now What? “When is keeping a calm face actually useful in real life?”

Cleanup and Reset